I recently attended a Wild Foods Workshop at Meanwhile Back in Saluda. When Alan Muskat (popularly know as The Mushroom Man) told us we were going to have lots of conversations with the plants, I knew we’d get along.
Me: hey pretty plant.
Plant: hi there.
Me: Chris, Chris Smith. When you say it fast it sounds like Christmas.
Plant: Hen of the Woods, when you say it fast it sounds like Hen of the Woods. Pleased to meet you.
Me: the pleasure’s all mine, you frilly thing.
Hen of the Woods: [giggles]
Me: what do you get up to when you’re not loitering around wild food foraging workshops?
Hen of the Woods: well- I’m not a show off or anything, but I’m one of America’s top five edible mushrooms.
Me: you just keep impressing. If it’s not too forward of me, can I ask where you live?
Hen of the Woods: [blushing] you know, The Oaks, typically the north side.
Me: I like it, a lady with style. I’d love to take you back to my house for pizza and wine…